Moustache - WHY WAIT FOR NOVEMBER?

There are many words and common phrases that have become so over used that they have ultimately lost any real meaning.

In an attempt to try and communicate, in a simplistic way, politicians, the public service and big business have coined a plethora of glib expressions. These are tirelessly repeated in an attempt to get the point across.

Transparency

Collaboration

Team player

Then there’s Julia Gillard’s ‘Moving forward’

Or:

Tony Abbott’s ‘Great big new tax’ that has now become ‘Toxic tax’

These originally had meaning and were valuable verbal shorthand that simply expressed a more complex thought.

But that meaning has been lost by over use.

The same has happened in advertising.

If you read ad headlines or even get as far as the body copy you will find a lot of sameness.

Many copywriters are slavishly using well-worn expressions to sell an idea, rather than look for a more original and memorable set of words.

I spied an ad for a mobile phone the other day that proudly boasted the headline: ‘Prepare to be awesome’

Since when has a phone made the user awesome?

The Great Wall of China, The Barrier Reef even Attila the Hun, all inspire awe, not a mobile phone.

In 1875 Alexander Graham Bell might have inspired awe with the invention of the first telephone, but not today.

Retail advertising is the worst offender.

They are using and re-using hackneyed phrases that once, way back then, might have convinced the consumer that they were getting a bargain.

Now their luster has worn off.

Once in a lifetime opportunity

Never to be repeated

Red-hot bargain

Closing Down Sale

Mammoth savings

Peace of mind

Get the edge

What’s stopping you?

The last one is probably the most telling as I think it’s the clichés themselves that may be the biggest hindrance to sales.

They are just a wallpaper of words that the punter sees, but doesn’t read, let alone respond to.

They have been made impotent by over and inappropriate use.

I have just received an email from my mate in Switzerland.

It’s one of those emails that you are meant to send on and brighten up someone’s day.

Well it not only brightened up my day, it made it.

Within it were a number of photos of church notice boards.

They usually give out the service times and a simple rallying message about praising the Lord and Jesus saving us all.

These ones go way beyond the expected and have taken notice board headlines to new heights.

Praise the Lord.

Staying in bed shouting, “Oh God” doesn’t constitute going to church.

St Cyril of Alexandria Catholic Church

God does not believe in atheists therefore atheists do not exist.

Palm heights Baptist Church

Forgive your enemies it messes with their heads.

Donelson View Baptist Church

Free coffee, everlasting life, yes membership has its privileges.

Goodwood United Church

Read the bible, it will scare the hell out of you.

Wyldwood Baptist Church

Walmart is not the only saving place.

Oak Grove Landmark Missionary Baptist Church

Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

Neighborhood Christian Centre

There are some questions that can’t be answered by Google.

Claude Presbyterian Church

I have just wasted a few hours of my life watching the final of Eurovision.

Everything seemed familiar.

The songs, wardrobe, look and even the dance moves, I felt as though I had heard them all before.

The Greek artist had a fusion of traditional Greek music with rap. Two wrongs don’t make a right.

The French guy had a great voice but not much more.

The Italians had a jazz theme, funnily I think I have heard it all before.

Next, the UK’s ‘Blue’ – Man Power on speed. I thought that Eurovision was about music, not muscles.

Lena, the defending winner from Germany, certainly had a great sound, but she was so last year.

At this point I am thinking, this is the Eurovision Song Contest, shouldn’t it be about the song?

Half the acts are about the stage show not the lyrics or the delivery.

Austria, so Céline Dion, so 1988.

Iceland was the sentimental favorites with a great song but a familiar sound.

The Ukraine used a sand artist. A great visual effect, that didn’t add to the originality of the music.

Serbia was a bit like Dianna Ross and the Supremes, only in Serbian.

Even the Eurovision show lacked substance. It was like a lot of current TV commercials – all technique with no real creative idea.

The only act that stood out for me was Moldova and their song ‘So Lucky’ with the fairy on the unicycle.

I could imagine them on Triple J.

It was a bit like watching 2 hours of TV commercials. Very few acts stood out or were memorable.

It was all wallpaper.

What is the criteria for Eurovision? If it’s originality then most acts have failed.

And the winner is – Azerbaijan with ‘Running Scared’

I somehow don’t think they have the staying power or originality of Sandy Shaw (1967) ABBA (1974) or even Céline Dion (1988).

The RACV (Royal Automobile Club of Victoria) has pleaded with the state government to adopt a road transport infrastructure programme and stop implementing quick fixes – like reducing speed limits rather than improving the roads.

I have discovered a quick fix in packaging.

More and more screw top jars are becoming impossible to open.

I don’t think that the average home cook could get the top off most jars these days, even if they do spend eight hours in the gym each week, pumping iron.

The only reason I can see for this is to improve security, by making the product more tamper proof.

They may have saved a few dollars, by not putting a security seal on their jar, but they will have pissed off a lot of customers who can’t actually open them.

Is it good business to save money and then lose customers?

Nestle have spent millions of dollars, or Swiss Francs, using George Clooney as the face of Nespresso.

This poster, I found stuck to the window of a coffee shop in sleepy Queenscliff, is a perfect parody.

And trust me it’s working, as the café was full.

I will put the disclaimer for this blog right up front.

I work for a B2B (Business to Business) advertising agency, so there is a vested interest here.

However that doesn’t distract from the fact that most B2B advertising is appalling.

And it’s appalling on so many levels.

Go through a B2B publication, there are hundreds of them, and you will see what I mean.

The ads lack a strategy or an idea, are poorly written, poorly branded and look like they were designed by the boss’s 3 year old.

They make a dog’s breakfast look like the winner from Master Chef.

You could almost expect a lack of creativity and communication skills in an ad for an EP/NN100 Coal Mining Conveyor Belt from the Shuangma Rubber Co Ltd.

But why is it well-known consumer brands suddenly take on a chameleon persona as soon as they run an ad in a trade publication? They spent millions of dollar building equity into their consumer brands then flush it down the toilet, by running a trade ad that mimics the rest of the dross in the magazine.

Isn’t the consumer, who is looking to buy an industrial air conditioner for a factory, the same one who might be looking to put a reverse cycle wall unit into the family room?

There shouldn’t be one brand strategy for consumer ads and another, inferior one, for B2B.

The consumer sees one brand and it’s bad for business if that brand doesn’t see one consumer.

Football

I don’t follow football, so what I am about to write may be obvious to those who are sports aficionados.

Being a layman has its advantages, as you actually see the world from a novice’s perspective.

I went to a lunch yesterday where the guest speaker was Paul Hamilton, General Manger Football at the Essendon Club.

Paul went through their reasoning for appointing the new coach, James Hird, and their rationale for also appointing Mark Thompson as assistant coach.

James has never coached before while Mark has an enviable track record, as senior coach, at Geelong, winning two premierships there.

So why appoint the novice ahead of the proven professional?

The answer is ‘marketing’.

James Hird is a legend at Essendon, an inspirational captain and player. Regarded by many as one of the greatest players of the modern era.

Getting him to coach the club was as much a marketing decision as it was a game winner.

James has a loyal following and is regarded as part of the fabric of the club.

So what they did was hire the personification of the brand, with the hope that this would lift their fortunes.

James Hird isn’t an ego like so many others. He is a genuine person, a team player.

It must be noted that Mark Thompson also has a great history with Essendon, after all, his nickname is ‘Bomber’.

Given the reception that Paul Hamilton received yesterday, I think this marketing exercise might just work.

There used to be clever campaigns.

They ran on TV, radio and in print.

The medium wasn’t important, the idea was. And the idea was so clever that it could run anywhere.

If the 1980s campaigns, by CDP, for Hamlet Cigars or Heineken Beer ran today, they would still be media neutral.

There would be iPhone apps, social media and of course the obligatory website, all built on the back of the core idea.

So why is there a proliferation of executions that only involve one media?

Like social media that only communicates if you tweet in ‘leetspeak’ or installation ads that speak to a miniscule audience with the hope of attracting PR.

I once had a creative director that would never approve one off ads. He was always looking for the campaign idea.

He believed that techniques went out of fashion while clever ideas were timeless.

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Hayden has just pointed out that Google did in fact print a number of hard copies of Think Quarterly.

These were free for their advertising and industry partners and they say that they have no plans to do a larger print run.

I still believe there will more printed soon and they will be for sale.

Time and marketing imperatives will tell.

Google has just produced an online magazine called Think Quarterly.

It’s aimed at their business partners and advertisers, and is stylishly designed.

I guess, given the name, that they intend to publish it four times a year.

It is the sort of publication that would make an excellent collection, especially a printed version sitting in your bookcase or on your coffee table.

However Google have made it very clear that this will remain an Ezine and there will be no hard copies.

Below is an extract from the Think Quarterly site.

“We’re flattered by the positive reaction but have no plans to start selling copies!”

Making the product a rarity is one of the oldest marketing tricks in the book. It also gives it a higher perceived value.

What’s the bet they will be releasing a printed version very soon?